Welcome to......Sandwichville

As you watch your daughter walk across the stage to get her diploma
you feel a swell in your chest. And you remember 2 years before, as
your son walked across the same stage. You and your wife and both
grandparents are so proud. Your father smiles as does your mom.
Your father in law stands and whistles and yells, as his wife pulls on his
jacket to have him sit down. A little embarrassing, yet, you almost wish you
could let go like that.
This time he is still letting out hoops and howls.
And your dad is very quiet, even more than usual, yet a smile of pride.

Two weeks later your father has a fatal heart attack. And you and your sister
are helping your mom deal with being alone after 54 years of marriage.
Your wife becomes busy helping her mother as her dad is doing strange things.
Starting a fire in the fire place even tho it is 90 degrees outside. And walking
around in the house at 3am talking loudly. Within weeks it is determine he has
dementia. Your mother in law wants to watch over him, after
all the vows are for better or worse. So your wife checks in with them daily.

Your second daughter is a junior in high school, so it is cheerleading and
soccer games. She hasn't got her driver's license yet. So you are lining up
driving classes and you are calling your insurance agent. Your mother calls ...
she fell down. She didn't break anything but is badly bruised. You and your
sister talk nursing homes or falls alarms. Which should you do? And now you
two are checking in with her daily. Helping with work in her home.

Crazy yet? Well, welcome to Sandwichville. That is where you and your wife
are the main support system for your parents and still have a child at home.
Running in both directions. Some how dealing with your children and your
parents is more stressful than raising all your children. And some where in a
moment of peace and quiet you think about how you and your wife were
planning next year at this time to start traveling. All of which is on hold now...
Now you feel guilty because you find yourself getting angry, as you know it
could be years before you can do any of those plans. It isn't because you
don't love your parents but..............you question yourself, are you being selfish?

This picture of life "the sandwich generation" is coming into play more and
more as parents live longer, dementia and failing health enter and the
couples still have children in high school. Or even younger.