I am not fun any more…

I am not fun any more…. 

I am thinking I am getting to be boring.. not bored, but I am boring. 

I am not fun anymore. I don’t do fun things and worse yet, is I don’t want to do anything. Just piddle around here.

I don’t think I am depressed. As I don’t feel depressed. I am happy for the most part.  I think what might be getting me down is other people.  Lol.. Not everyone. But in general. I just don’t feel like putting in the extra effort with most of them.  Sounds bad doesn’t it. But you see a lot of people seem, well, like they want to talk about some subjects and that end up with arguing. That isn’t how I use to live my life. Arguing.  Discussions .. even different points of view from time to time. But not arguing.. more like .. wow never  thought of it like that?  Not changing my mind or theirs .. respecting my friends enough to know they didn’t always think like I did. And that was ok with both of us.

But of late .. I have come up with an attitude .. I think they had a song in the 80’s about it..  It was something like You are right, you win…   I forgot the name of the song.   Anyway, it has been interesting to see the looks on some faces when I stop them with.. ‘ you know you could be right about that.. and then I change the subject..  I don’t believe in what they are saying.. just it is easier to just drop it.. they are hell bend on their opinion and I am going not going to be able  change it…it is too much effort and I have better things to do. but it is kind of like letting the winds out of their sails. It isn’t important to me any more to be right. I believe what I believe and that is between me and my maker. 

I think what 2020 did for me.. it I don’t have time for b.s. Life is too short.  At my age, I sometimes wonder how much time do I have.  After all, a lot of people don’t get to live this long.  Guess God still has a need for me down here to make a difference for others.  But I sure wish he would show me how to have more fun at it.  

Maybe the answer is to have less to do with the angry people.. they bring others down.  And that means me too.

So will look more for the Roses in the world and not the thorns. 

I miss having fun.  Being the 79 year old great grandmother who ran races in the yard against my great grandson and getting to the end… and saying I WON… and the times he would beat me and be beaming… with I WON, I BEAT YOU..NANA.. those were great days..  Got to find my groove again.