Who handles the purse strings in your family?

Who handles the purse strings in your family?

Over the years.. thru 3 husbands..  I have been the one.. They made the money … the first two..  and I paid the bills, got loans arranged, got income taxes paper together and did the taxes for a while,, when it was simple.

And with this husband..  we both worked, but I am the one who handles the paper works.. meaning also the bank account.  With that I am the one who finds the sums that he wants to use to buy from our budget.

So far my bookkeeping had endured without problems..  I say so far, because I know there will come a day.. when I am going to need help before I go.. And that person of choice is my youngest. The reason she is, because she lives here..  It helps that she is also a bookkeeper by trade.  But I am sure my bookkeeping will drive her crazy until she figures out my system.. The system that works for us.

I have always paid bills first..  food second.. and if there is any left over, then we got to do something fun.  All 3 men have had good credit rating because of my attitude..  bills first..  It wasn’t easy at a few times.. But it was done.. So the first one walked away with top notch credit rating… The second one passed away with top notch credit rating.. and the one now.. he came with the lowest of low.. due to going into business with his brother, before  my time..  But thru hard work,  Skimping here and there, we brought him out 5 years later.. and now he has a top rate..  None of this was easy.. 

But I saw women who’s husband left.. or died and they had not a clue how to run the finances of their lives..  Didn’t even know what bank he was using.. That was scary..  I also decided to make sure my husbands  would not be in that position. 

The problem I found when my second husband passed away was ..  we had everything financially in his name..  credit cards, utilities, bank accounts were in his name.. and  cars were in his name..   So my first widowhood job was to find a way to get that into my name..  The credit cards would not let me continue in his name.. and as far as my name..  I had NO CREDIT RATING..  because I had no history of credit..  One of them.. I wrote to ,we had used them for about 5 years..  I told them if there was a way to see our payments, they would know I was the one making sure the payments were paid monthly.. usually in full..  I told them I had the cancel checks with my signature on them.. not my husbands.. So they decided to let me have one.. for .. $1000 .. credit line..  It took them a year to trust me.. Along with me paying .. I had gotten the utilities in my name as well, and they saw that record.

So I am trying to make sure my guy knows what is what.. I have everything in BOTH of our names.. so no matter who goes first, the other doesn’t have to fight the company to keep things going.   He hates doing book work.. I make him to it at least twice a year. 

But for backup, my daughter knows where the book is that I use to keep monthly track of each bill..  I have a file cabinet with the bank info.  I have a grab and run bag in the file cabinet..  so if we have a fire, there is the important papers or if I pass first.

So it is a good idea that BOTH of you know ALL of the financial information.  Which bills that need to be paid monthly.. where that income come from and where it goes.. in the year of 2023… there is no excuse for not both of you to know..   One can handle it..but the other needs to know where everything is.. and how to handle it … just in case.  And yes, I know there are spouses that would  or can not handle money at all..  That is sad.. you are a team.. and should work as a team.