Verizon, you make me laugh....

I am sure a lot of you have gotten the ad in the mail like this. But it always makes
me laugh...

First of all, see the GUARANTEED TO NEVER GO UP
can you read the small print? Well, after the part
about $29.99 a month, you will read the tiny print that
says: w/-2yr agreement speeds up to 3 Mbps. So does
that mean NEVER is only for 2 years?

But it gets better.. see this one with the price of $17.99
which looks just like the paper ad I got in the mail? Well,
that was on their site when I went to check to see if it was
even available here. (So the paper ad gives you a price
that is $12 more than what they could give you, if you went on
line.)

Then there is the tiny print on the back of the paper ad from the
mail. really got to watch this stuff.... I separated this as they
had it all running together...
Customer Respect Group's 2009 Customer Service Study of Telecommunications
Website. ???

Offer for new residential HSI customers w/VZ voice service. subject to
credit review. (HSI high speed internet)

$99 early termination fee.
One time charges of up to $60. (where was that listed and for what)
Price Guarantee applies to base internet rate excluding taxes and surcharges.
So those can go up, right? so much for NEVER GO UP
Changes to service plan or VZ discontinuation of high speed internet to your
location cancels offer. (so much for NEVER GO UP)
Add'l chrges, taxes and terms apply. that isn't listed in the ad..Service availability (see below) and speeds may vary.
did you see that where they had the price listed? not even an * to say
look on back page...
HSI will provisioned at up to 1.5Mbps or up to 3 Mbps based on VZ line
now the front ad with the price says up to 3, but doesn't say as low
as 1.5Mbps.
qualification requirements. Valid 6/21/09 to 9/30/09. 2009 Verizon.

And finally, up above says....Service availability ...that is why I went
to their site. See I have been getting something like this for years about
fast speed internet... and every time I have checked... well, they never heard of
Kootenai the town, so it is never availability. Even when I
checked today.

So here it is, price will NEVER go up, yet it is only good for the 2 years.
AND...it isn't even available. Now they have to send this add to my house,
so you would think they would NOT send to my zip code as we can't get it
from here.

YES, Verizon, you make me laugh...oh, the other thing, I have had 4
friends who had Verizon Internet in the past... all 4 of them dumped it
with in a month. Now where did I put the paper shredder?
Guess they better stick with their phone business, they do pretty well
there...