NO Walls, No Floor
This is the recipe for remodeling your
bathroom..If you have only one bathroom.
FIRST RULE: DON'T...do it yourself....
SECOND RULE: Knowing you have
already skipped Rule One.... make sure
you have some one who knows that they
are doing, to help you....if you insist on
this being a as a self improvement job. .
So you are insisting on doing this
yourself... Sad, real sad. But here I will
give you the recipe. And for gosh, sakes
don't skip the rest of this.
Check out a book or buy one at Home
Depot. This can be skipped if you paid
attention to Rule Two, and have a
qualified contractor friend/family
member who will help you.
Next, make sure you have all the tools.
As hammer, screwdriver and saw is not
enough. If you have that friend/family
member, they can help you in this
department. They may have all the tools
you need. Or they will take you to Home
Depot or such, to buy or rent what you
and the person don't have.
Next, expect at least two weeks to do this
job, and if you have skipped Rule Two,
well, sorry, wife, but this project will never
be done and you will be lucky enough to
have a toilet in 2 weeks.
Next, look into the possibility of Port-a-
Potties for 2 weeks. Maybe you should
rent a camp trailer or borrow one. You
will need it. For the toilet part. And if it
gets too hot between spouses, one of you
can sleep in there.
Next, and listen really well. Make a list
of good friends. Really good friends. And
how close they are to your house is where
they will rank on this list. These friends are
very important. Because they are the ones
you will hint about using their showers for
the next 2 to 3 weeks. Of course by day 3, you
may not have to hint, the smell will have
them offering, or they will shut their blinds
and turn off the lights at night.
Next, in your budget,...... you are going to
make up a budget of supplies before you
start, aren't you? No? You thought you wing
it as you go along? Oh, boy, this is going to
be worse than I thought, no budget planning.
It won't be any good anyway, I guess. As
when you tear out the walls and floor, you
will find rot. Lots of little spots of rotted
beams. So included at least 6 extra beams
in your list of supplies. But also on this list....
the price of a dozen roses for each one of
your female friends who let you use their
shower, and listen to your tales of woe...
Beer for the guy friends.
Are you scared yet? Be afraid...very afraid.
We did Rule Two, and we are on the down
hill side of the remodel. We are within a day
of having it all done. Oops, should not have
said that... maybe two or three days left.
But boy, is this going to be looking great...
Thanks to one of Sweetie's best friends,
who is helping. And next month, the
remodeling will be just a memory. And
we will have a room of pride, instead
of cringing, when some one ask to use
13 hours ago