Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Caretakers for parents...

As time goes by, and we get older... some have to deal
with caretakers for their parents... Sometimes it is family.
Sometimes it is agencies.  And some times it is health
care centers, (use to be called nursing homes).

Over the years, there have been large families.. Use to
be in the same town. Brothers and sisters.  So when Mom
or Dad, started to fail, there was family members close by
to step up to the plate.

Some of them took the parents into their homes. To raise
the children and care for the parents.  In those days, the wife was the one who did most of it, as she didn't work.

Then wives started with careers of their own. But still with
so many children, there was enough support system. Some
would chose to stay the night with the parents.  Each choosing a night.

But now, that the boomers are coming into the scene.. it is
the years of fewer children.. The family average was 2 children.. Where in the 1940 and even 50's it was anywhere from 4 to 8 children. 

With fewer children, there is also the moving to different states from where the family home is.. Children are spread all over the states.  So the support system is lessen. And some times strained.  Especially if one child is still in the area of the parents, and the rest are far away. Leaving most of the support on that one child. Sometimes there are the out of area children who, maybe by guilt, complain about the care of the parents. And of course, the one or ones left in the town, aren't too thrilled with the siblings who complain but don't come help. Too busy, as if the ones in town, don't have a life and aren't busy. Leaving a strain relationship all the way around.

But now, as the boomers get older.. and the next generation coming up.. some without children.. where is the caretaking support system going to be?  Will strangers or friends, neighbors, be picking out caretakers and health
care centers for those who have no children.

So where will be the family caretakers?  And who will be taking care of you? 

1 comment:

thomg57 said...

Boy, does this hit home. My wife's mom has been having a rough year and now that we ar so far away Melinda is feeling very guilty about it. Last year my mom died, but prior to that my oldest sister bore the burden of caring for her during her descent into Alzheimer's. Very stressful on all, but especially the one who is primary caregiver.