4 Questions...

I did a post on bitterness a couple of days ago,
that may have lead others to believe that I was
bitter.

And the answer to that is, no. What I meant
by my post was, that there is bitterness out
there and with good reason. The political
stories and comments were as if Obama
was trying to stir up something that wasn't there.
It is ... and that is my point.

Myself, at this point of the game. At this age.
Have decided to look at the positives in my life.
And not dwell on the negatives. And not let
others bring me down with theirs. Because as
you know, it happens all the time. Especially in
the work force.

While working, I had decided that our Noc crew,
would not add to, or take part in the gossip mill.
When we were sitting one night, waiting to go
on, I mention how stressful our job is, and how
we can add to that stress by participating in
the gossip. That if we were to not do it. Not
listen in on the other shifts (day shift was the
worse for it) then we could do our job and be
happier. Would the others like to try it for a
month? They were all for it. And it worked.
I even heard one of the girls, who was talking
to a gal who stayed over to help us because
we were short handed, that our shift didn't
listen or pass gossip. So please don't tell me
that stuff.

In life itself, we tend to worry about other people,
and take on their problems. Giving advice and if
you are an enabler or a caretaker personality, you
want to fix it for others. It is easy to slip into that.
And get upset when they don't do what we told them,
or remarked to them about their problems.

So about a year or more ago, I came up with the
4 questions. And it has worked out well for me. And
even have the King using them. Since thing, in
conversation, I have mention them to friends and
family. And they seem to like them too.

So here they are, in case you would like them.

The 4 questions you have to ask yourself.

1. Am I responsible for this?
90% of the time the answer is no.

2. Am I financially responsible for this?
90% of the time the answer is no.

3. Do I want to be responsible for this?
99% of the time, the answer is no. Because it
isn't your business. And most people resent you
telling them how to fix their problems.

4. Do I want to be financially responsible for it?
99.9% the answer is no. Because when you give
money to others, you are not helping them find
answers to their problems. And you end up acting
like a crutch for them. Which is no help at all.

You can be understanding, you can be sympathetic,
but it is not your job to fix things for others.
And believe it or not, two things happen. They fix
their own problems. And you have let a big load off
of your own shoulders. After all, you have enough
just taking care of yourself and spouse. These
people will survive. They will most likely make a
different choice then you would, but it is their life.
Just because you have an idea how to run things,
doesn't make it right choice for them. So give them
and yourself a break.

Now, look at life. There is so much out there, and it
is free to enjoy. You have hikes, you have the lakes,
you have the sky, the mountains, the love of your
children, your spouse. you have hobbies. What more
do you want? It is out there if you look.

My lesson last summer was... downsizing was good
for us. We do less, but we do more. We don't need
all the toys, bells and whistles, yet we are having fun
and we are happy.

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with
the intention of arrivingsafely in an attractive and
well preserved body.
But rather to skid insideways, chocolate in hand,
a glass in the other...
body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and
screaming "WOO HOO What a Ride!"