I can't sing

No, really, if you heard me, you would know I can’t sing..
In Church I am like Bill Cosby… remember he talked about
his brother Russell and he singing, but only mouthing the words.
And how he almost got caught as he had mouth the words AMEN,
only to be almost caught as he had to shift his mouth for the words
that turn out not to be AMEN, but FOREVER MORE…That is me.

I was told when I was in my 20’s and had a husband at that time who
played guitar and sang. One day I decided to sing with him as I knew the
words… only to be shut down by an instant stop of guitar playing to silence,
and a glare… and words of… what ever made you think you can sing? You
have a terrible voice. Needless to say my singing was done from then on
in….. in the shower when I was the only one home.

About 15 years ago, I was taking my grandson to a soccer practice and
a rock and roll song came on, and I started to sing along with it, forgetting
he was in the car…. To hear him say, “Nana, don’t give up your day job.”
Smart mouth kids.. lol… I had a night job anyway… but I knew what he meant.
So still, I don’t sing with others within hearing distance… only if I am home alone.

I got to admit.. I couldn’t hold a tune, if it came in a bucket… But it does
Remind me of a song about 40 years ago, I think it was sung by Red Sovine.
About Brother John, who was in the church choir and couldn’t hold a tune
either and the others had shamed him so bad.. he left the choir and the church.
And the Pastor came to his house to see why he wasn’t coming to church.
When he explained, the Pastor told him.. that to God, all of us sound good,
after all he was the one who gave us our voices.. Which I thought was a
nice thought, but I sure wish the good Lord had gave me one that was a
little more pleasing.. to others… I didn’t want to sound like Loretta Lynn,
but just good enough so people don’t get this painful look on their face if they happen to catch me singing..