Friday, August 05, 2005

Letting go and Let God

We think that when our children
become adults that the worries are
less.

And for the most part that is true.
If we laid the foundation well, then the
child grows up to be a pretty solid adult.
While I don't take credit for my
children's good deeds, and the good
that they do for themselves, their family
and others, I am glad that my foundation
held up.

I have always told everyone who says
nice things about my children, that I
only laid the foundation, what they see
is what my child did with that foundation.
So the adult they see deserves the credit, not I.

But as they grow, there are times they
do something that could be.... I said,
could be, dangerous. Even with the odds
of 99% safe, there is still the 1%. And this
is where I really depend on God. For many
years I have hung on with dear life. My
child was not aware, but I was very much
aware of my clinging. I worried from the
moment they left my presence until they
return. Losing sleep, wondering, hoping,
they were ok. But now that I am older,
and hopeful faithfully wiser... I have learn
to let go and let God.

And it has been tested. I was doing fine
when one of my son's was talking to me
about how he very well could go to Desert
Storm. He had all this possession taken
care of. Where they were going and who
would watch them. (he was on the East
Coast and I was on the West Coast, so it
was his friends in charge of them). I was
doing fine. I was proud of my son and
his attitude about going. They didn't
have to ask him (he was in reserves),
he offered to go. The kicker was when
he told me, he had his WILL all taken
care of. A moment of silence as he talked,
a deep breath of air, and I tried to keep
the worry out of my voice. I knew the
possiblity was there. Just the word WILL
hit like a brick building. We talked and
joked, and he left the conversation with
how he would call before he left, if they
took him. I got off the phone and cried.
I had never faced the mortality of my
children before. God had a serious
talk with me. As it was, they ended
the war 2 weeks later, so he didn't
have to go. But I was ready to let
God.

As your children come with their
families to visit and leave, you worry
about the traveling and sigh with
relief and thank God for his grace,
when they arrive here or home,
depending which way it is.
When they have surgery, you give it to God
When they go somewhere that is
a wonderful adventure, but can be
dangerous...

You have to let go, and let God.
Not an easy lesson for most of us...

But I have learn it, now we will see this week... how well..

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