This past Saturday, we attended a wonderful tribute to
a wonderful funny lady, called Eve... Eve is my sister
in law's mom..
Of course like any memorial, there are stories that
fly around bring laughter.. but I really think ours had
it hands down. But I will let you be the judge...
It was a very, very serious day. We were to attend the
installation of Eve to be Madam President to the Elks
women's association. I am sure it had an official name,
but that escapes me right now.
Sandee and her husband Gary along with my husband,
brother to Gary... walked in to the big hall and found a
seat in the front row. That was our second mistake.
Our first mistake was taking the guys with us.. They wanted
to go fishing.. but Sandee insisted they come and support
Eve in this endeavor... that was our first and most huge
After we were all seated the performance started. It was
explain that their regular piano player was sick and Mrs.
what ever her name was, was filling in..
All of the women were dressed in white gowns that
reach the floor...with long white gloves... (don't remember
if they had hats on or not)... They all stood at the other
end of the hall. Then several of the woman started.
as this was a highly pomp and circumstance ceremony,
and to be taken very seriously.. VERY SERIOUSLY,
(remember that part).
They marched in silence to 3 different areas. And turn
and stopped facing each other towards the center of the
hall. Then what appeared to be a very elderly woman,
the highest of highest outgoing officer, started her march
towards them. She was very fragile. I don't know if they
had a man on each side of her, because of her rank or
because she was fragile. But it was a good thing they
were there. Because as she stepped off to the music,
she was a little wobbly. And the music starts.. THREE
BLIND MICE. She step forward, with a long shaft in
her arm, that was sharp pointed on the bottom end
and a elk head with full horns on the top round section.
About 6 steps in to the march, she started to go the right,
which the woman in front of her was motioning several
times that she was to go to the left.. All while THREE
BLIND MICE is being played over and over and over.
My brother in law is starting to lose it... his body is
shaking all over, of which set off my husband.. (you
have to know these two grown men.. who occasional
act like 8 year olds). About the time the men get her
swung around, about face.. she catches her high heel
on the corner of her long gown and just about did a
face first to the floor, being grabbed about 2 feet from
the floor by the two men, and swept upright, almost
clearing her feet from the floor. Of which the piano
player swung into her other song... GLOW WORM..
Well, that is all it took to get our men going, to the
point of losing it. While my sister in law and I used
our elbows for weapon of mass destruction, to get
these two full grown men to straighten up. It worked
for a little while .. about 3 minutes, when we were
back at THREE BLIND MICE... and the tiny little
lady was given a seat to sit in, with the men standing
beside here... And then back to GLOW WORM,
and Eve started to march to the group, and facing
toward one side and then to the other side.. and up to
the front with the little lady, who then stood up,
and proclaimed her MADAM PRESIDENT..
I am sure there was a little more to this part, but
we kind of missed it as our men had once again
return to bowls of jello, And our elbows came
into play with glares that would have frozen the
hottest of fires. Once Eve started to talk, they
did bring it back down.. and listened.. But after
Eve, got done and turn around.. to go back to
the beginning, with the rest of the ladies, following
her.. up comes the music again.. THE BLIND MICE.
thru 3 times.. and ending ...you guess it.. GLOW WORM.
Which by this time our guys are singing under their breathe,
heard by all around us... GLOW LITTLE GLOW WORM
GLIMMER, GLIMMER, SHINE LITTLE GLOW WORM,
GLIMMER GLIMMER.... (as the ladies filed out of the hall)
and the row behind us fell apart laughing... And comments
of how they barely could contain themselves, as they watch
the guys and us trying to keep them maintained.
Then we left the hall to the other room. and the guys said
NOW CAN WE GO FISHING? And my sister in law glared
at them and said.. YES.. get the heck out of here.. As the
guys were heading to the door... they saw there was food.
They started back, and my sister in law.. said oh, no.. no
more.. OUT .. OUT.. and they left..
We found out a little bit later from Eve, who had asked
us what was up with the guys and what were they doing
as the people behind us were giggling.. ... She told us
the replacement piano player only knew two songs...
so they went with it... lol..
So there you are with out Eve story... the GLOWWORM
Only challenging story was the wine story.. Seems when
Eve was getting near the time to leave this earth... she
express the desire for wine... The Priest said she
could have wine... So the granddaughter ran to Fred
Meyers and got a bottle of wine.. White Zinfandel,
which we all know that is what Eve drank.. She gets there and
pours a half of a glass, Eve sips some and makes a face
and told her Granddaughter. THIS IS HORRIBLE.. I KNOW
WHERE YOU GOT THIS.. AT THE DOLLAR STORE!!
So from now on when ever any of us drink White Zinfandel
wine.. we will refer to it as the DOLLAR STORE WINE..
....... and with that, I leave you laughing..