Tuesday, February 12, 2008

In 1986 I lost a husband

1986 was going to be a good year. After
June we would be down to one child left at
home. We were going to travel. We had postpone
it until the kids got grown. We did the usual camping
and things with the kids, but never traveled across
country except to move. And that was in a rush.

We were going to travel around the USA. We were
going to go see family without a funeral for a reason.
We were finally getting to that point. We were really
looking forward to it.

In January of 1986, my husband was going in to
the Vets hospital. It wasn't his first time.
He had had bypass surgery several times
in the 1970's.

So we were not concern very much. He had
had veins replaced in his legs, and then later
in his stomach. But his circulation was acting
up again.

To make a long story shorter... he was there in
January, and part of Feb. And then they sent him
home. Without doing anything. They had him come
home for 2 weeks. When he went in for his appt. they
saw he wasn't getting better, and he wasn't behaving
himself. As one of the conditions was he had to quit
smoking. Being a smoker for 50 years, it wasn't easy
for him to quit. Also they said no beer. He did both.

In March they ended up doing surgery on him 4 times
with the last one removing his leg. He went into
depression. He wouldn't even try to physical therapy.
Until he saw a double amputee go up and down a ladder
with hardly any trouble. He was doing pretty well,
when they decided in April, that his other leg wasn't
going to make it. So they removed that one too.
4 days later he threw a clot in his heart and died.

He was 57. 57, way too young to die. Our daughter
was 16. I was 46. To say it was a blow is an understatement.
As I said to him at the cemetery, "you were suppose to
lose your legs, not die." He was my husband, my lover,
the father of our children, and most of all, he was my best

My point in telling you this....is. Be sure to tell
your love ones that you love them, every day.
Not automatic, but like you mean it. Thankfully,
I did tell Marv that. But also, don't wait to do
things together. Don't put off to tomorrow, what
you want to do.

Because sometimes, tomorrow never comes.

1 comment:

MarmiteToasty said...

((((Cis))) goodness.... how very very sad for you all... Im so sorry... and your right about letting those you love know and saying it often.... I know actions are greater then words but sometimes the words mean so much more....